Sex Tips: Masturbation for All - Part 2!

Masturbation For All! Part 2: Toys, Toys, Toys!

My hands and arms are sore from all my masturbation! Any tips on what else I use?
-Some say you’ll go blind, my arm just got tired

This is part two of last week’s column on masturbation. I discussed many types of masturbation, but there was a glaring hole in the writing; no talk of sex toys. Why? Because they’re so awesome that I decided they needed a section all to themselves. Now, I’m not saying that everyone needs toys, but they are definitely fun to try, and if you’ve been trying the masturbation thing, and think you need a little more, or if you’re an old hand at it (no pun intended!), toys can take you alone time to a whole other level.

Let’s start with definitions, I know all these crazy names can get confusing.

A vibrator is pretty simple; it’s a toy that vibrates. They come in MANY shapes and sizes. Eggs are egg shaped, and can be used for clitoral stimulation, or shallow insertion into the vagina. Usually they come with a cord that is attached to the power pack. Different eggs have different types of settings. Some just have 2 or more levels, some have a dial that you can use to turn it up and down, and (my personal fav of the eggs) have different “programs,” so you can have fast pulses, slow pulses, roller coasters, random, and more. Eggs can be made out of plastic, rubber or silicone.

Then, there are your traditional slim-line type vibrators; these are long and relatively thin (although they do make them in thicker versions as well), and are slightly tapered at the top. These are usually made out of plastic, although sometimes they are made out of silicone or rubber. Most of them have a twist knob at the bottom that you can use to turn it up or down. Many women use these for insertion, but of course they can also be used for clit stimulation. They tend to be a little less powerful than the eggs, so it depends on what you’re looking for.

Next, we have the family that I like to call the rabbit vibes (although they now have all sorts of animals on them) that were made popular by Charlotte on Sex and the City. These have a main shaft, and then an animal of sorts (a rabbit with ears, a dolphin tail, a panther nose, etc) that when the shaft is inserted, rests directly on your clit. These vibes are silicone or rubber, and usually have two different control settings; one that directs how fast the clit extension vibrates, and the other controls the shaft settings. Some shafts vibrate, others have beads in them that move or rotate.

Lastly is my absolute favorite of the vibrators is the wand vibrator. The main one is the Hitachi Magic Wand (see my review), but other companies make them as well. They plug in to the wall. That’s right, no batteries needed, they carry 110 volts. AMAZING. Now, if you only like a little stimulation, this probably isn’t for you, unless you put a pillow, blanket, or something in between you and it, but I personally swear on this vibe. It has a plastic handle with a two-speed switch (high and higher!), and then a soft, almost microphone shaped head. You can place the head anywhere on your body (nipples, mons, etc), and on your lips and clit. Additionally, they made attachments of different sorts for penetration; smooth, bumpy, g-spot stimulating, etc. Just be warned that if you used it during a rainstorm and the power goes out, you’re going to be one unhappy camper. Other wise, I am in love. With a piece of machinery.

Next, we come to dildos (and many vibrators are mistakenly put in this category). Dildos, which can be plastic, silicone, rubber, or the stunning pyrex, are long, phallic shaped (though not all are made to look like penises) toys which are meant for insertion into the vagina or anus. Sometimes called dongs, these are the things you see in movies that DO NOT vibrate, and are usually used when women are masturbating and are pushing it in and out of their vagina and/or anus. You can use a vibrator and a dildo at the same time (or for that matter, two vibes at the same time); feel free to be creative. A note; the only dildos that should be used for anal play are ones that have a flanged base (far larger than the tip), because unlike the vagina, the anus is a hungry beast, and will suck things up into it, far into your rectum and beyond, and you don’t want to have to explain to the ER doctor why you’re doubled over in pain. Anal plugs can also be used during masturbation; just again, remember, the bigger the base (not the toy itself of course), the safer you are! NEVER put an egg, or any corded toy in your anus, as the cord can break during removal.

Now there are all sorts of other toys you can use, many of them you can use with a partner (dual vibrators, double dildos, remote vibrators, nipple clamps, etc) as well as with yourself, so I think I’ll do a different column on toys with your partner, so keep an eye out for that.

In the mean time, let’s have a quick talk about cleaning your toys. Firstly, if you’re going to share your toys, use condoms on them. Yes, you can transmit STDs and other germs (and you don’t want a bacterial infection there, I promise) by sharing toys. Also, if you’re going to use a toy in your anus, and then in your vagina, condoms are definitely needed. Other wise, just clean them regularly. Glass dildos are easy; you can boil them. Plastic toys you can rub down with rubbing alcohol, or soap and water (just keep away from battery compartments). Silicone and rubber toys need soap and water; alcohol can dry them out. And as a side note, using lube on your toys is a great plan, just NEVER use silicone lube on silicone toys; it WILL melt them, and then no more toy.

As far as buying toys, many bigger areas now have female and couple friendly adult stores (many with toys out on the counter with batteries in them to let you know what they feel like) that are well lit and fun to shop in. Still nervous? There are TONS of awesome online sites (that bill with non-descript names) with lots of choices, and customer reviews. Our favorite is Babeland.com - VERY female friendly.Happy Hunting!

Essin’ Em

Lots of toys means lots of choices! Here’s a whole category of videos to help you: Instructional: Toys, or if you can’t decide, we offer you The Ultimate Vibrator & Dildo Guide: